Great stuff as always, AE. I'm starting to think that Two's become just a little impetuous when it comes to teasing Mack. It's adorable, but she's made the transition from making innocent comments to full on intentional snide. ^_^
Also, yay Ian! I'd wondered when we'd be seeing him again.
Looks like the wild guess from last chapter was on the mark. :-) I look forward to reading about the theater group and the outfits devised for the duo. Perhaps a little foreshadowing of Ian's transfer to the bardic arts program.
I guess as far as kinks go cross-dressing has less 'What the Hell Hero?' potential than savagely beating your invulnerable girlfriend. Also from Steff's comments about wanting to be a Pettanko seems she's still judging everything by 'faint-elf standards', I am so hoping she grows out of that.
Well, I haven't been much of an Ian fan but I really liked him here. Mack needs a bit more of him in her life in a way I can't really quantify right now.
I hadn't realized how much I'd missed Ian, so much has been going on I just didn't notice he wasn't there. He is a rock in Mack's sea of chaos, albeit sometimes volcanic.
“Hold on,” I said as we headed onward, . “This isn’t adding up.
The comma and space after "onward" don't belong.
“Listen,” Steff said. “I thought about it. I’m half-human, and human women… more womanly than elven women, right?
Not sure if this is a typo or just Steff dropping a word because she's so exhausted, but there seems to be an "are" missing before "more". *shrug* If that's just Steff then no problem.
“Two, will you leave please it alone?” Amaranth said.
The words "leave" and "please" are swapped.
Also, not a typo but I just wanted to mention:
“Oh, kheez, I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t think I’d startle you that bad.”
“Gotta be careful,” Steff said airily. She giggled. “She’s vulnerable to greetings.”
“Listen,” Steff said. “I thought about it. I’m half-human, and human women… more womanly than elven women, right?
On second reading, I find this a little odd. Steff seems to be saying that women with small breasts are less womanly than those with big ones, which is kinda against her whole worldview (namely, that your gender identity is not dictated by your body).
Then again, she's OK with having smaller hips and boobs, so maybe womanly is just shorthand.
She's just not being very articulate at the moment, but it's the same basic idea of what Dee referred to as "the human body’s tendency towards greater sexual dimorphism".
Something in this chapter bothers me. So here they are with a person collapsing from what pretty much amounts to malnutrition and overexertion. They all know what should be done (urgent feeding and rest) yet what do they do? They stand around blaming people with nobody in any hurry to do anything. Seriously, won't someone please consider Lahtinen and the machinegun? It's like in some movie: The world will explode in ten seconds unless we stop it, but nobody's going to do jack shit before we're finished discussing who's been having sex with whom first. Never sits right with me.
I think that can be chalked up to the "It's College" phenomenon. Kevin Smith mentions in one of his Q&A videos that the writer crafts their ideal world. In his world, everyone stands around having witty dialogues or monologues with plenty of pop-culture references. In Tales of M.U. much of the story centers around the discussions of the characters, this is simply how Alexandra moves the story along. It's not what would happen in "real life", granted, but then again if this story was more like "real life" it probably wouldn't hold the interest it does.
When reading a novel, or watching a movie, there is this little thing known as "Suspension of Disbelief" that should be happening for you to enjoy the story. The world you are watching or reading about doesn't have to operate like the one you live in everyday. The characters can do things that you and I simply can't. This is why it's called a "Fantasy", because illogical, improbable, and impossible things can happen in the characters daily lives. Now I have no doubt that if Steff was bleeding profusely, they would rush her to the healing center. But as long as they are walking toward the cafeteria as they are talking, I wouldn't exactly say they were doing nothing.
You really should work on that Suspension of Disbelief thing and just enjoy the story. Sometimes it doesn't have to make sense. Remember, this is not the world you live in, it doesn't have to follow your laws of physics and biology. It might share some outward appearances, but it has it's own physical laws that govern it. Fantasy biology alone might explain why they aren't more concerned, Steff is half Elf, after all. Elves live for centuries, forever barring accidents. Most every fantasy story I've read about elves has them eating small, delicate meals. Maybe elves don't need as much food as humans do? Could be that if Steff was 100% human, she'd have wasted away to nothing, but because she is a Half-Elf she's a bit more resistant to starvation. I think we should just leave it up to Alexandra, this is her world after all so she makes the rules.
What I would be more concerned about is what Vicktor is going to do when he finds out Steff has been quaffing potentially dangerous potions. I don't think this transformation elixir was on the list of approved potables from the healing center for Steff's mood problems. He could be understanding given the circumstances, or he could go ballistic. Remember, he has an agreement with Mackenzie that for every transgression Steff makes, Mack will recieve the punishment since that really seems to drive the point home to Steff when nothing else will.
I think you've posted in the wrong place. This is actually the space for people to comment on chapter 381 of Tales of MU. While the set-up sounds similar, the events you're describing took place in a different story. In this story, as soon as everybody is aware of what's going on, the question is raised of whether food or rest is more important, and when the answer is determined to be food, the characters begin moving the afflicted individual in that direction.
It's nice to see Ian again! I was worried that he was going to break up with her for sure this time, but it looks like things are ok. For now, anyway. I can't wait to see what sort of costumes they come up with!
Come to think of it... when did we last see Ian? For all I know it has only been a few hours for Mack (though I think it's been a couple days? Not sure about passage of time) but it might be useful if Mack reminded us somehow. I know he hasn't seen her since the piercings, but given intermittant updates and text-time, I'm not even sure how long ago *that* was.
Obviously it wouldn't be, *dramatic voice-over* "Last time on MU, Ian and Mack were..." but I'm sure AE could manage some more in-character/subtle way to remind us.
Huh... I was thinking it'd be cool if Iain dressed up as a demon and Mackenzie dressed up as an angel... but I'm not sure what that would do in the MUniverse. What if a costume on Veil caused the person wearing it to take on some semblance or attributes of the thing they were pretending to be? Mackenzie could get hurt if she started generating positive energy.
Oh, and Gloria would probably hate her for mocking all that was good and divine. So even if my idea of a costume changing a person was complete rubbish, Mackenzie would still probably get divine energy directed her way...
Thank you Ian, for reminding Mack she has a mirror... except that it reminded her instead she has an appointment book and will forget both before the end of the afternoon.
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May 18 2009, 23:10:00 UTC 3 years ago
First comment!
Great stuff as always, AE. I'm starting to think that Two's become just a little impetuous when it comes to teasing Mack. It's adorable, but she's made the transition from making innocent comments to full on intentional snide. ^_^Also, yay Ian! I'd wondered when we'd be seeing him again.
May 18 2009, 23:13:46 UTC 3 years ago
Wild Guess!
Looks like the wild guess from last chapter was on the mark. :-) I look forward to reading about the theater group and the outfits devised for the duo. Perhaps a little foreshadowing of Ian's transfer to the bardic arts program.May 18 2009, 23:53:58 UTC 3 years ago
Re: Wild Guess!
I guess as far as kinks go cross-dressing has less 'What the Hell Hero?' potential than savagely beating your invulnerable girlfriend. Also from Steff's comments about wanting to be a Pettanko seems she's still judging everything by 'faint-elf standards', I am so hoping she grows out of that.3 years ago
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A bazillion things are happening and I am, for once, not confused. This confuses me.
May 19 2009, 00:22:27 UTC 3 years ago
May 19 2009, 01:11:50 UTC 3 years ago
He is a rock in Mack's sea of chaos, albeit sometimes volcanic.
May 19 2009, 01:58:22 UTC 3 years ago
Typo Report
The comma and space after "onward" don't belong.
Not sure if this is a typo or just Steff dropping a word because she's so exhausted, but there seems to be an "are" missing before "more". *shrug* If that's just Steff then no problem.
The words "leave" and "please" are swapped.
Also, not a typo but I just wanted to mention:
LOL! Steff FTW! =D
May 20 2009, 06:33:43 UTC 3 years ago
Re: Typo Report
On second reading, I find this a little odd. Steff seems to be saying that women with small breasts are less womanly than those with big ones, which is kinda against her whole worldview (namely, that your gender identity is not dictated by your body).
Then again, she's OK with having smaller hips and boobs, so maybe womanly is just shorthand.
Or maybe she's just loopy right now...
May 21 2009, 12:25:05 UTC 3 years ago
Re: Typo Report
She's just not being very articulate at the moment, but it's the same basic idea of what Dee referred to as "the human body’s tendency towards greater sexual dimorphism".May 19 2009, 02:13:21 UTC 3 years ago
My irony gong is giving me headaches.
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May 19 2009, 03:55:20 UTC 3 years ago
Female breasts but could end up
Tragically hipped
Feeding Steff's fever
Won't prevent her from feeling
Starved for affection
One should always take
Careful preparations when
Filling out one's form
May 19 2009, 06:49:07 UTC 3 years ago
May 19 2009, 10:30:37 UTC 3 years ago
It's like in some movie: The world will explode in ten seconds unless we stop it, but nobody's going to do jack shit before we're finished discussing who's been having sex with whom first. Never sits right with me.
May 19 2009, 18:19:25 UTC 3 years ago
When reading a novel, or watching a movie, there is this little thing known as "Suspension of Disbelief" that should be happening for you to enjoy the story. The world you are watching or reading about doesn't have to operate like the one you live in everyday. The characters can do things that you and I simply can't. This is why it's called a "Fantasy", because illogical, improbable, and impossible things can happen in the characters daily lives. Now I have no doubt that if Steff was bleeding profusely, they would rush her to the healing center. But as long as they are walking toward the cafeteria as they are talking, I wouldn't exactly say they were doing nothing.
You really should work on that Suspension of Disbelief thing and just enjoy the story. Sometimes it doesn't have to make sense. Remember, this is not the world you live in, it doesn't have to follow your laws of physics and biology. It might share some outward appearances, but it has it's own physical laws that govern it. Fantasy biology alone might explain why they aren't more concerned, Steff is half Elf, after all. Elves live for centuries, forever barring accidents. Most every fantasy story I've read about elves has them eating small, delicate meals. Maybe elves don't need as much food as humans do? Could be that if Steff was 100% human, she'd have wasted away to nothing, but because she is a Half-Elf she's a bit more resistant to starvation. I think we should just leave it up to Alexandra, this is her world after all so she makes the rules.
What I would be more concerned about is what Vicktor is going to do when he finds out Steff has been quaffing potentially dangerous potions. I don't think this transformation elixir was on the list of approved potables from the healing center for Steff's mood problems. He could be understanding given the circumstances, or he could go ballistic. Remember, he has an agreement with Mackenzie that for every transgression Steff makes, Mack will recieve the punishment since that really seems to drive the point home to Steff when nothing else will.
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Obviously it wouldn't be, *dramatic voice-over* "Last time on MU, Ian and Mack were..." but I'm sure AE could manage some more in-character/subtle way to remind us.
May 19 2009, 12:56:35 UTC 3 years ago
Oh, and Gloria would probably hate her for mocking all that was good and divine. So even if my idea of a costume changing a person was complete rubbish, Mackenzie would still probably get divine energy directed her way...
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(Seriously, that makes me very happy for some reason. Looks like they're both branching out, even if it is in a clumsy way. ^n_n^)
I hope this actually does work out and make Steff happy.
May 20 2009, 08:41:52 UTC 3 years ago
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